Behind this smile of mine…is a longing for affection...a desire that I know will never be fulfilled. A longing that becomes real only when in my dreams. Behind my smile…is a dream that I pray will never end...a false reality that will always be... filled with false hopes that I look forward to. Behind my smile... what's left is my heart…shattered over and over again in aspirations of something I know I will never have... never have to hold, never have to love and never will ever be. I don't know how to get the message across...a part of me wants her...another part of me wants to avoid the pain. She's here when I get back from work...and stays till I awake...what is she trying to do to me...??
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