Dreams....

I'm home...finally. I'm tired of living out of a bag...sleeping in a bed not mine and waking up to a strange mornings. I don't know how long I'll be back...I hope it'll be awhile before I leave again, but then...tomorrow is always a new struggle of hopes & dreams. Ms Dragon is gone...she left before I could return...before my eyes could see her for the last time...before I could tell her the way I feel about her. I have only said those words to her in my dreams...they seem so real... Why is it that in my dreams, I can feel her...touch her?? Why does she smile and look at me like in reality...?? Why does she torture me in my dreams about the things I miss about her...?? Tossing and turning...I'm dreaming with a broken heart...It's more than what I can take...It's seems she's in my thoughts and dreams every night...I can't sleep...so I stay awake and wonder.

Waking up is the hardest thing...my eyes feels as if their burning...I can never let go of her in my mind...the sound of her voice...the feeling of her hand in mind...I don't want it to be over. But dreams have to end...only to continue the next time I close my eyes... It's painful to relive the same dream every night...to let go of the person you miss most...over and over again. I hope she knows how I feel about her not being in my life anymore...I hope she understands what I did was best for the two of us...a silent goodbye holds a thousand words... Dreaming of her is torturing me...isn't once enough for her to break my heart...